For those of you who know me, you’re probably wondering what made me, a person who was majoring in biology, with a concentration in biotechnology, and a minor in biochemistry, suddenly decide to start a blog about minimalism, mindfulness, and motivation. Well, I can tell you the exact moment.
Now this is the story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside down. And I’d like to take a minute just sit right there – Kidding, I’m no Fresh Prince.
Anyways, it was a few weeks ago. I had woken up late, just as I do on most days, only I was REALLY late this time. This wasn’t the kind of late where you can rush around a bit and get to where you need to be on time, or even just a few minutes late. This was the kind of late where even if you could suddenly teleport to where you’re supposed to be, you’re still nowhere near being on time. It was 8:30 a.m., the morning of my big, scary, Chemistry II final, but here’s the thing – The final started at 8:00. There was absolutely no way I was going to be able to make it. So I laid in bed for a few minutes and I thought “I hate chemistry. I’m going to absolutely die in Organic Chemistry next semester.” I continued to lay there, defeated by the clock, and dreading scheduling the makeup session for this final, when it suddenly occurred to me: I hate chemistry, I hate math, and I only kind of like biology. Why am I pursuing a degree in something that I really don’t like? It dawned on me, that I was forcing myself to suffer through these classes that I hated for the sake of the supposed paycheck that I would get once I secured a position after graduation. It was at that moment that I promised myself I will stop revolving my life plans around money. I made it my goal that day to discover what it is I really love, and change my major to that. One thing I realized was that I enjoy writing, and it comes so naturally to me. I never have to force it, and I have always enjoyed myself most in English or writing classes. The other thing I love, is people. Really, if you’re reading this right now, whether I know you or not, I probably already love you. I love the diversity and uniqueness of all of the different people I encounter in a day. I often find myself making eye contact with strangers, because I can’t help but stare at every person that passes me by. So, I decided to change my major to sociology, with a minor in writing. I plan to obtain certifications in public and professional writing, as well as in public health and substance abuse counseling. If I can even just make a positive impact in the life of one single person in my lifetime, I’ll be satisfied. By the way, I never ended up re-scheduling that final, and as a result, I got a big, fat F in Chemistry II. Oh well, it just reinforces the fact that it’s not the thing for me.
So, a few days after that, I was reading a book called The Magnolia Story by Chip and Joanna Gaines (you may recognize those names from the HGTV show, Fixer Upper). As I’m sure this book was just meant to be a story of the trials and tribulations of the lives of young, poor, entrepreneurs as they get their start on their professional lives, their words resonated with me. As Joanna describes her internal struggles of keeping both her family happy as well as a picture perfect home, she comes to the realization that “getting our intentions right simplifies our decisions in life and changes our perspective,” and that really stuck with me. It made me reflect on the reasons why I do the things that I do, and I found that much of what I do isn’t in fact for me, but only for how I would like to be perceived.
I also found that I, like many others, was waiting until I was where I wanted to be in life to allow myself to be truly happy, rather than appreciating where I am now. However, where I thought I wanted to be in life is years away from where I am now. So what, am I not supposed to be content until five years from now? Then once I’m in my dream home, at my dream job, and everything is “perfect,” then what? That seemed silly to me, and I made the conscious decision to begin implementing things that I love into my life now, not years from now; And to love my life as it is, and enjoy the adventure on my way through college, and throughout my exploration of different career paths. I also now have a completely different idea of the meaning of the word “success.” Before, success was money, a nice house, a career, and vacations; But now, success is a loving family, food to eat, and a roof over my head.
When I came to all of these realizations, I chalked it up to be a sort of quarter-life crisis. I was (and still am) confused about what it is I truly want to achieve in life, and it occurred to me that I am definitely not the only one. I also realized that rather than keeping these realizations and confusing thoughts to myself, I should share them with as many people as I can get a hold of.
I really, truly hope that my words may follow you throughout your day, during the good times and the bad, and instill some feelings of hope as we stumble through this beautiful and ever-changing life together.